A 500-Pound Man Riding a Motorized Scooter in Walmart Sets a Fire . . . to Distract From His Low-Speed Shoplifting:
26-year-old Kevin E. Gillman of Whitehall, Ohio weighs almost 500 pounds. And like everyone who weighs almost 500 pounds, when he goes to Walmart, he rides one of their motorized shopping scooters.
But on Tuesday, for whatever reason, Kevin decided to use that motorized scooter for some LOW-SPEED SHOPLIFTING.
First Kevin grabbed some paint. Then he drove himself to the clothing section, threw some paint on the clothes, and SET THEM ON FIRE. That fire was SUPPOSED to be a distraction while Kevin stole electronics.
But the fire created CHAOS . . . and the store's front door got locked, which blocked him from escaping. Yes, Walmart's door got locked during a fire, trapping everyone in. But that's an issue for another day.
A Guy Who Packs Stress Balls for a Living Punched His Boss in the Face:
44-year-old Darren Baldwin of Blackpool, England was a warehouse worker at a novelty product manufacturer called SPS. And his job was to pack stress balls. But the company was doing some layoffs, and Darren was one of the people let go.
And instead of channeling his rage into a few hard squeezes on one of the thousands of stress balls at his disposal, he FLIPPED OUT . . . and PUNCHED his boss in the FACE.
After he punched out his boss, he went and grabbed TWO KNIVES, and started screaming that he was going to, quote, "cut up" all of his coworkers.
Darren just pleaded guilty to assault. He'll be sentenced next month.
A Woman Accidentally Pocket Dials Her Boyfriend While She's Cheating On Him, and Sparks a Massive Brawl:
On Monday, 28-year-old Jamie Sniffen of Mohegan Lake, New York snuck out of the home she shares with her boyfriend, 37-year-old Allen Slavin.
She took a taxi to see 45-year-old Larry Graff in Cortlandt, New York. He's one of Allen's friends, and a police report describes him as, quote, "obese."
It turns out Jamie was cheating on Allen with Larry. But while she was there, she accidentally POCKET-DIALED Allen. So he heard her and Larry GOING AT IT.
And he freaked out. He went to Larry's house, and started YELLING at him. Allen pulled a KNIFE . . . Larry threw a three-foot speaker at Allen . . . and they started BRAWLING. Allen pulled a PELLET GUN and pistol-whipped Larry, then took off running.
Larry wasn't arrested, but he was hospitalized with a punctured lung. Allen was charged with felony assault. And JAMIE was arrested too, for misdemeanor hindering prosecution . . . because she tried to wash the blood away from the crime scene.